Once upon a time, there was a lovely princess, who had moved into a flat after a difficult break-up with a frog. Surrounded by boxes, her doorbell rang. She let down her hair to let the visitor climb up and found a local genie bearing a bunch of flowers, sent by her Fairy Godmother.
Sadly this was not the happy ending it could have been, since the princess had lost her one vase in the move. The beautiful flowers were plonked in the sink, and then transferred to an IKEA measuring jug, where they languished until they died an inevitable death.
And lo, Death to Flowers was born.